Originally Posted: Saturday, January 06, 2007
1. WHAT CURSE WORD DO Y0U USE THE MOST?
Shitcicle. Noun. Definition: A tapering spike of shit flavored ice formed by the freezing of dripping or falling shit. Used in a sentence: "Vin, don't even tell me that's a fuckin' shitcicle hanging from the toilet seat."
2. DO YOU OWN AN IPOD?
3. WHAT PERSON ON YOUR TOP 8 DO YOU TALK TO THE MOST?
Matt P.'s Moms.
4. WHAT TIME IS Y0UR ALARM CLOCK SET TO?
5. DO YOU STILL REMEMBER THE FIRST PERSON YOU KISSED? Yeah. Right. But I'll say Pamela Anderson for the hell of it.
6. DO YOU WEAR FLIP-FLOPS WHEN IT'S COLD?
People who wear flip-flops other than at the beach are either hippies, dirtballs, or gay. You decide.
7. WOULD Y0U RATHER TAKE THE PICTURE OR BE IN THE PICTURE?
How about neither.
8. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Rocky 6 (not really I'm just a little embarrassed that the last movie I watched was Bikini Gang 4. The plot totally sucked)
9. DO ANY OF YOUR FRIENDS HAVE CHILDREN? Yeah, maybe I should get one. You know, to fit in and shit.
10. HAS ANY0NE EVER CALLED YOU LAZY?
I have a theory. It goes something like this: If you're young and you don't hear "you're fuckin' lazy" on a regular basis then you're trying entirely way too hard and just making the rest of us look bad. Its not because you wear big ass glasses, play number munchers & war craft on the 'puter all day, stink like low fat popcorn & donkey dick, watch re-runs of Star Trek, and/or read books that cause you not to "fit in" and have zero friends other than your tickle-me Elmo doll you cuddle with every night. Its because you're trying way too damn hard and ruining it for the rest of us. So what I'm saying is this . . Be lazy and you'll have more friends. That simple.
Go with me on this . . .
11. DO YOU EVER TAKE MEDICATION TO HELP YOU FALL ASLEEP?
No but for those interested in this kinda shit I recommend drinking some grain alcohol. That shit makes you pass out fast (assuming you drink enough of it), or atleast you'll think you're sleeping but really you're awake doing some crazy dumb shit... and its like "damn, where the fuck was I?" Then you'll wake up in the hospital to some male nurse trying to stick a needle in your arm. But don't worry . . you'll fall asleep again in like a couple minutes.
12. WHAT CD IS CURRENTLY IN YOUR CD PLAYER? Black Ty
13. DO YOU PREFER REGULAR OR CHOCOLATE MILK? Breast.
14. HAS ANYONE TOLD YOU A SECRET THIS WEEK? Why? Was somebody supposed to tell me a secret this week?
15. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU HAD STARBUCKS?
Fact: Real men don't do Star Bucks.
16. CAN YOU WHISTLE? Only while I work.
17. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX?
Eyes. Feel me on this one for a second . . . No, not because of color or any of that corny ass shit (Please, I'm A.N.T.) Eyes as in "are they both looking and directed towards me?" I don't need a woman with one eye on me and the other all wandering around the room and shit checking how fast the ceiling fan is spinning and shit. Feel me? Of course you do. See guys are too worried about all that other shit (boobs, asses, etc.) and not watching them eyes, then they take them home to meet Mom and when you go to introduce her you see the good one looking at Mom and that other thing peeping into the living room directly on the left of her. Then you have that whole awkward "damn, baby. when the fuck did you get one of those?"
Trust me, not cool.
18. DO YOU THINK PEOPLE TALK AB0UT YOU BEHIND YOUR BACK?
I'm not sure but I know a lot of them dream about me . . if that counts.
19. DID YOU WATCH CARTO0NS AS A CHILD?
You mean the babysitter?
20. WHAT MOVIE DO YOU KNOW EVERY LINE TO?
Weapons of Ass Destruction.
23. DO YOU OWN ANY BAND T-SHIRTS?
This question should be "Do you live in a trailer park?"
24. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SALAD DRESSING?
These questions suck ass.
26. DO YOU DO YOUR OWN DISHES?
I don't own dishes. Mom does. So therefore she can do her own dishes.
27. EVER CRY IN PUBLIC?
Cry? Laugh. Whatever.
28. ARE YOU ON A DESKTOP COMPUTER OR A LAP TOP? My profile song is the shit.
29. ARE YOU CURRENTLY WANTING ANY PIERCINGS OR TATTOO?
Yep, trying to save up enough money to get the scrotum pierced. Figure one more wave of birthday money from the fam and I should easily have it.
30. WHATS THE WEATHER LIKE?
I don't know but some weird shit is happening because its been warm as hell and its January. I have a theory but I'm still working on it...
31. WOULD YOU EVER DATE ANYONE COVERED IN TATTOOS?
Why? So I could end up in a trailer park, getting abused by my spouse, working at a strip club, fixing lawnmowers in my spare time, and dying a heroin addict? I don't think so . . .
32. WHAT DID YOU DO BEFORE THIS?
Wondered about what kind of shit they have Al Gore on.
33. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SLEPT ON THE FLOOR?
Who the hell sleeps on a floor and owns a computer? Better yet . . . Who the hell sleeps on a floor and has a Myspace?
34. HOW MANY HOURS OF SLEEP DO YOU NEED TO FUNCTION?
The amount of hours it takes for me to wake up by myself.
35. DO YOU EAT BREAKFAST DAILY?
Eat breakfast or sleep? Hmm... This ain't rocket science people.
36. ARE YOUR DAYS FULL?
Of shit? Yeah, literally.
37. DO YOU PAY ATTENTION TO THE CALORIES IN THE PACKAGE?
No, and those people that do are a joke... and fat. I'm just sayin' . . .
38. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
No but I do like to keep it in my pocket . . Right next to my cassive mock.
40. ARE YOU PICKY ABOUT SPELLING AND GRAMMAR? Yeah, including typing errors. For example whoever wrote these questions in all caps needs to jump on the fuckin' short bus and take that shit back to middle school.
41. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO SIX FLAGS?
Almost... Cuz like yea Dad, I totally want to feed these fuckin' flamingos over hitting up the fuckin' Batman roller coaster. Asshole.
43. DO YOU GET ALONG BETTER WITH THE SAME SEX OR THE OPPOSITE SEX?
Sex. Is the opposite of sex really a friggin' option?
44. DO Y0U LIKE MUSTARD?
I don't know but I just got this gross image in my head of retards drooling. You got that too? Weird....
45. DO YOU SLEEP ON YOUR SIDE, STOMACH or BACK?
Hers . . . for all of them.
46. DO YOU WATCH THE NEWS?
ESPN, not so much anymore but yeah. ESPN.
47. HOW DID YOU GET ONE OF YOUR SCARS?
48. WHO WAS THE LAST PERS0N TO MAKE YOU MAD?
Question #41 brought back some bad memories so yeah . . . my Dad.
50. WHAT IS THE LAST THING YOU PURCHASED?
A lap dance? But I don't really remember that night so . . .